You will get talked about at Champps!!

Oh man, i had to blog about this while it was fresh in my mind! Tonight I rounded up a bunch of people to go watch the Packer-Cowboy game at Champps in Addison. If you've never been to a restaurant or sports bar for a big game, I highly recommend it. The atmosphere is great. TV`s everywhere, cougars on the prowl & the occasional over dressed fan, usually make for a great time. All that being said I had a great time tonight and it wast because of the any of the aforementioned reasons. Because of the high demand of the game alot of the tables were pushed close together. This made it easy to talk to other tables about the game and just make general conversation. It also made it easy to hear what other tables were talking about. Well , midway thru the third quarter my entertainment began. During a commercial timeout I just happened to hear the tale end of a very heated argument between the people sitting next to me. "Muthafucka, you don't fuckin know me. I ain't the one." When I turned around to see where these words were coming from, I saw this skinny white girl with bad skin, rolling her neck and snapping her fingers, raining down expletives on this black guy who had a smirk on his face. The white girl had a girlfriend (who was black) and the the black guy had another guy with him and both these sidekicks were struggling to keep from laughing. So at this point im not even looking at the game anymore, im more interested in seeing where this situation is headed. Before I could make more sense of the situation, the white girl continued, " Fuck you, I went to a black school & Im an AKA so I can talk how I wanna talk, I ain't the one". I started grinning and repositioned my chair away from the tv screen & in front of this train wreck. Apparently, this black guy was giving the white girl a hard time for "talking black", and I guess she tried to justify her "blackness" by volunteering all that info. Big mistake. As soon as she said all that, it was like a light switch was turned on in this guy, because he started talking bad to this girl. "Bitch you only went to a black school because you didn't have the grades to get in anywhere else". "Hoe, i don't know why you trying to be black, you need to concentrate on being white! You got on all that make up and still got bad skin.......shit don't make sense" He just started verbally assaulting this chick and all I could do was laugh.......hard. She tried to get him back......"that's why you fat". Hearing that was like a seeing a pitcher toss a softball to barry bonds, only one outcome can occur. "Mr. Bonds" shot back wit "Don't worry bout me, u need to take ur skinny ass to tha gym. This bitch cant even afford a gym membership. working at customer service making 7 dollars an hour." When he said that half our table started listening and laughing. It was about this time when the white girls black friend jumped in and tried to help her. "That's why you talk so low with that fat ass gut" Oh man, these comebacks were so weak. It was like they brought knives to a gun fight.....and this guy had a fully loaded clip. He started going hard on the black chick, "bitch are you even black? you ain't even got no ass! get the fuck outta here!" "Bitch you got on fake jewelry too! All that lead around ya neck from shopping at Sam Moon! Keep buying that cheap shit "3 dollars will get you killed" At this point me and half my table are all laughing uncontrollably. Soon as he saw he had an audience the material just got better (or worse for the people getting talked about) "Bitch you ugly! Wearing glitter on you face like you 15! Who the fuck wear glitter on they face? "This ain't the circus" "Take this white girl to Karma, Max wells or whatever black club y'all going to and get the fuck outta here" Oh my God. I didn't even care about the game anymore. I had tears in my eyes. I kinda felt bad , because me and about 6 others were pretty much laughing in their faces, but we couldn't help it. His timing was on point and his delivery was outstanding. "You hoes cant even fit regular clothes." "Y'all went to baby gap to get outfits to come to Champps? Who does that?" "You hoes broke too! This bitch brought her own cup into the bar?!!! What kind of bum ass ghetto bitches bring their own cups to the bar?!!" What made this hilarious was the fact that these chicks actually brought their own wine glasses to Champps!! I was dying!! He laid into them for 30 good minutes. Dude was out of control. The whole time the white girl had her face down pretending to text people on her sidekick. But it wasnt hard to tell that each insult cut deeper than the last. I was hoping for tears but it didnt happen. To those girls credit, they sat there and took it on chin for a good minute. [im thinkin they stayed so long because there was no where else to sit, but ill still give them the benifit of the doubt] I laughed so hard that my stomach started to cramp. The hardest laugh came when the white girl decided shed had enough and took the walk of shame out of the restaurant. As she walked away he said, "Truth hurts don't it. See ya at Karma!!" [For those of you who don't know, karma is a black club in Addison. extremely ghetto] YES!!! He talked about her so bad that she left Champps!! Packers game was good but this scene stole the show for me. Good times!!! The moral of this story is that if you are a white girl with bad skin, just be a white girl with bad skin - just be yourself and you wont get talked about! My tab that night was 15 bucks . potato skins -6 dollars, frozen margarita - 6 dollars, tip - 3 dollars (yes I'm cheap) & seeing a white girl trying to be black get talked about so bad that she left the restaurant - priceless

Till next time......