Anyway, I haven't been on here in a minute so I guess I should give a little recap of what's been going down in the world of Emeka.
Beckham: He's still proving all the haters wrong. Sounds pretty cheesy but this guy really inspires me. He's constantly scrutinized and criticized but time and time again he turns the other cheek and with a grin on his face, he proves everyone wrong. He doesn't mind being hated or being the villain. He can take it because he knows at the end of the day each time he puts on that England jersey and performs at a high level, he is one step closer to history: South Africa 2010.
Work: Despite the recession, I am still gainfully employed at "Random Video Rental Company Inc". Its been a year since I left that shitty candy company I used to work for and by far its the best thing that I could have ever done for my career. But with a new job comes a new set of challenges, some that I never thought I would be forced to deal with. I feel torn about the current state of things at work because on one hand I am doing what I set out to when I graduated college. I am constantly learning & I feel like I have grown leaps and bounds in one year than I did in the 2 1/2 years at the shitty candy company I used to work for. On the flip side the work load can be extremely heavy. I look at the people who are higher in the food chain and wonder how the hell they are able to function in society as much as they work. I see what the career path is where I am & I sometimes ask myself "Is that what you want to do with your life?" I never thought work would ever effect my life outside of it, but this job has shattered that perception. Don't get me wrong, I work hard. I've worked hard for everything I have and I am thankful for every opportunity that I have been given. But when you watch multiple people leave, one of which left because he barely saw his young child awake because he worked so much, you have to take a step back and ask yourself, "Is this for me". I don't exactly know the answer to that just yet, but I'm sure in time I will.
Friends: For some reason this year I have managed to lose a lot of close friends and one important relationship (probably the relationship of my life) just ended. I think it would be easy to just pass this off as a case of they suck and its them, not me; but maybe it is me. Maybe there is something about me that just eventually pushes people away. I don't have that "Let them make it gene", no matter who you are, if you make me feel a certain way, ill let you know how it is, and I guarantee you won't want to hear it. Most people don't, and that's how good friendships/relationships go bad. I feel like at the age of 26 I should be able to manage relationships better than I have. I don't know if I can change though. When things go bad/I'm backed into a corner /I'm pushed too hard, I just shut down and walk away. It's a lot easier for me to walk away from stuff than to deal with them head on. I think I am destined to be alone, at least thats the way it seems. Alone can be good though. Less people around to let you down.......
Moving forward: For some reason I think I am going to start doing whatever the fuck I want to do. Being the first born to Nigerian parents, you are raised to sort of be fearful of everything. Nigerians like to go with the safe bet. Taking chances is looked at as being reckless instead of following your instincts or following your heart. So because I'm the mood I am going to list out a few things that I hope to accomplish this year, God willing
1) Tattoo- I think its time for me to get some ink. I've been wanting this for some time & I think I am just gonna do it : Fuck it
2) Bubba - There is about 4grand worth of work that I want done to my truck to make it everything I ever wanted and I'm probably gonna do that too. I have a job, I have savings, why not. Yes, I named my truck Bubba. And I plan on getting a custom license plate too......
3) Vegas- I will be in Vegas at some point this year, maybe that's where ill get my tattoo
4) Re-evaluate living in Texas - not sure how much longer ill be living in Texas. I'm over Dallas. I'm kinda over Texas period. I feel like there is more to life than Dallas, TX and I want to see it....I need to see it......who knows.....
5) Get more involved in church. For some reason I've been acting like my parents didn't raise me to go to church. Like a heathen or something. I've been slacking big time. I need to get back in church. I need to get back to the basics.
6) Blog more. I always say my life could be a great pilot for a TV comedy or drama.....I need to start writing this shit down. If i can get back to a daily blog that would be cool. There is some good shit in these archives [shameless plug] , so i know I'm capable.....need to get off my ass.
Reality TV: I swear this shit is like a drug. My new addiction is Bad Girls Club & For the love of Ray J. I faithfully DVR these shows and even watch the re-runs. I know its disgusting. I am out of control. Another good one is the show "From G's to Gents". Someone needs to go google this clown representing Houston named "Riff Raff". That's probably the funniest name I've ever heard. So funny!! Nice to see that other people have train wrecks for lives as well. Good times.
I think this is enough for one night. I'm refreshed, I'm reloaded, I'm back.
Until next time.......................
1 comment:
so clearly your daily blog hasn't been effective, but you know how it is. anyway.....I know we don't talk often.....very rarely...but know that I am still your friend....but it does seem as we get older...those old relationships die...and me..I am such a relationship person...that it hurts when they do...even the ones that we know end for the best. Some people dont have your best interest at heart...so why keep them around...you know what I mean. Well....thakns for sharing....4 months ago. :)
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